Born in a hospital that looks like an octopus (or a squid--I can never remember the difference), I spend way too much time imagining what the life of Mr. Rourke from Fantasy Island was like.
As a child, I was cradled by Hulk Hogan and appeared on the front page of the Seattle Times. I may have peaked too early.
After graduating from college, I moved away from my hometown, vowing never to return.
I have since returned to my hometown, and now I vow to never trip over a giant pile of money, just in case.